Home   >   Interviews   >   Interview with Rebecca Dakin

Interview with Rebecca Dakin

By on September 6, 2011

Hello Rebecca, for those that don¹t know who you are, please tell us and please describe yourself.

Hi I’m Rebecca an ex convent girl, turned escort, turned author and dating coach from the UK.

What was your thought process leading up to becoming an escort? What triggered the decision?

I was fed up of working earning a minimum wage, and I’d failed at university, so I actually thought it was the only way I could earn a high income. I’d thought about it when I was around 21, and discussed it with my first boyfriend. Needless to say he wasn’t keen on the idea. By the time I was 23 I had had enough, and I wasn¹t going anywhere career wise, so I took a gamble and ventured to the dark side. I reasoned that because I was on minimum wage it didn’t matter if it didn¹t work out, because I knew I¹d get another minimum wage job easily.

While you were escorting you specialized in “The Girlfriend Experience”. For people that don¹t know what that means, please explain it?

The Girlfriend Experience (GFE) means different things to different people, but to me it meant specializing in longer dates, dinner dates and weekends away. I was a hired girlfriend and had some wonderful experiences traveling the world. The GFE is a more intimate encounter unlike the PSE (Porn Star Experience) which is just about sex and usually with no kissing.

To me I don¹t believe that ladies should offer a GFE if they don’t kiss, because the GFE is supposed to be as close to a real girlfriend experience as possible, for a hired service transaction. This was done not only by offering kissing; but also by being a good companion; attentive and funny, building rapport and a connection with the gentleman, making him feel desired and like a million dollars. I was so “girlfriend like” that I¹ve even had arguments and tears on my dates, and the guys seem to love me more for it, as it made me a real person, and more genuine.

You have left behind your escorting days and are now a dating coach and author. As a dating coach, do you help out both men and women or do you mostly help one or the other?

As a dating coach I coach men on how to be successful with the women they desire. I help them with online dating including writing their profiles, and I offer Skype coaching for all their concerns/issues/challenges with women. I noticed when I was escorting that I actually saw a lot of single men, and divorced men. Usually all of them were looking for girlfriends, and although seeing an escort is a quick fix, many of them became disillusioned and thought that it might blossom into a real relationship. I now catch these guys before they take the easy option and book an escort, which is fine for a short term fix, but in the long run it is unfulfilling and highly addictive for some guys.

I would coach women if asked because I have spent most of my life learning intimate details about men and their needs.

As was already mentioned you are an author and your first book,”The Girlfriend Experience”, is your autobiography. What made you decide to write it and what was it like looking back?

Reading Belle De Jour, another UK book about an escort, made me want to tell my story. Belle was anonymous, at the time; therefore the book was very impersonal and lacked depth. There was also nothing negative written it was very glamorized. It was also all about PSE¹s which is what most people think working as an escort is ¬ all about sex. It fueled the stereo-type and I wanted to show that there were actually a lot of men that were paying for much more. I thought writing the book would be a good closure on that side of my life, but also it would educate other people about a different side to escorting.

Your second book, “Why Husbands Stray”, is more of an advice book. What subjects and advice to you expound in this upcoming book?

I would like to carry on breaking stereo-types and so my next book is a series of short stories from cheating husbands about why they cheated and how seeing escorts made them feel and how the dynamics of their marriages changed and broke down. I want to show that not every cheating man is a cheat and that some men are in very difficult situations and that seeing escorts is the only way they can keep their marriage together. It will be very insightful for women, so that they can learn more about men and their needs, and the reasons they stray. Hopefully it will help women infidelity proof their relationships.

Do you have any plans to write any more books? If so, what do you think the next one will be about?

“Why Husbands Stray” is work in progress, and I have many more unpublished diary entries from my escorting. So yes there are definitely more books on the horizon.

Seeing that you are British and that you have visited the US, what would you say is the biggest difference in the views of sex and sexuality between Americans and other people on the planet?

My escort dates with Americans were always very laid back and that’s what I enjoyed about seeing Americans.

Do you have a funny story from your days as an escort that you can share?

I once saw a 93 year old guy who worked with Winston Churchill. He showed me photos of him with him, in a book he¹d written about his life. It was a platonic dinner date, but he wanted to meet for a bedroom date the next time, and I had to decline, in case he died on me!

I also chastised someone for their poor hygiene once because they said they never brushed their teeth. It transpired he didn¹t have any! That was probably my most embarrassing moment. We’d eaten out and he¹d had steak and I didn¹t notice. He must have sucked his steak.

How would people back home describe you when you were growing up?

They’d say I was funny. I have always enjoyed making people laugh. I would always perform and seek to be the center of attention. I was told I used to have funny frizzy white hair!

Are there any projects or special events coming up that you would like to promote, if so please do so?

I’m really passionate about my date coaching, so I¹d like to ask that guys have a look at my website http://www.datingadviceformen.co.uk I work with single men and recently divorced guys. I help them build their confidence with women, change relationship patterns that mean they end up with the wrong women. I also help with guys that suffer from anxiety when approaching women, and build profiles for online dating.

My book “The Girlfriend Experience” is available in the US as a hard copy or Kindle. I am selling signed copies via my blog which I can ship to the US. It’s open and honest and has all the nitty gritty, so it’s not for the faint hearted.

http://www.rebeccadakin.com is my main site where people can find general information about what I’m doing now.

About Christina