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Review of The Rocki Whore Picture Show: A Hardcore Parody

By on April 28, 2011

Wicked Pictures, with Brad Armstrong at the helm, dives head first into the porn parody pond with their first attempt, The Rocki Whore Picture Show: A Hardcore Parody. The story takes place in one chaotic night as we follow the two newlyweds Janet and Brad (jessica drake and Rocco Reed). They find a creepy castle where they find refuge but are quickly shocked because they find out that they have just dropped into the middle of a porn movie shoot. Frank-N-Beans (Mac Turner) is the eccentric director and he is joined by his camera man Stiff-Staff (Randy Spears), two porn starlets, Vagina and Euphoria (Nicki Hunter and Alektra Blue) and his two makeup artist Mona and Lisa (Kaylani Lei and Annie Cruz). So can Janet and Brad make it out with their sanity and innocence intact? Find out as Wicked takes you on a journey filled with singing, dancing and hot sex in The Rocki Whore Picture Show: A Hardcore Parody.

Scene 1: jessica drake and Rocco Reed

After jessica and Rocco have a quick chat in their car and Rocco eases her doubts about only being with one person for the rest of their lives, jessica then starts to suck him off. Rocco helps himself to a helping of jessica’s clam next and after she is all warmed up she straddles him in cowgirl. This doesn’t last too long though as Rocco pulls out and drops his load on her inner thigh. This is a pretty quick scene. It works though because the scene does take place in a car and they are quite confining when trying to have some sexual fun. I would also like to add that jessica stays in character during the scene as she continues to use her higher pitched voice throughout.

Scene 2: Alektra Blue and Nicki Hunter

Mac thinks that jessica is a natural for his movie but comes to the decision that maybe she should sit back and watch so she will know what to do. So, as she looks on, Alektra and Nicki start to make out. Once the two ladies get somewhat undressed the real action begins as Nicki starts to lick Alektra’s pussy while she leans back in a chair. Alektra then takes control as she eats out Nicki and also slides four fingers inside her. Nicki gets on all fours after this so that Alektra can pull out a glass toy and to use said toy on her ass. She pulls out a second toy a little while later for some DP action with toys. Nicki gets back into a seated position next as Alektra continues to use a toy on her pussy while she continues to finger her ass as well. The ladies then switch things up as Nicki starts using a toy on Alektra, who also uses a toy on herself at the same time. This is a pretty fun scene but I was disappointed in the one sided nature of it. Nicki was on the receiving end by a large margin over Alektra. I would have preferred if things were a bit more equal but the scene still works as a whole.

Scene 3: Alektra Blue and Brad Armstrong

Alektra calls down to Brad and tells him that she is in the mood for a little sex but he thinks she says sax. The situation is quickly fixed by Alektra as she then gets him to climb up into her room where they quickly start to make out. Brad starts off the action by having Alektra lie back as he fingers and licks her. Alektra, not to be out done, takes her turn with some oral as she swallows Brad’s cock for a bit before lying back again for some missionary. Brad then lies down so Alektra can straddle him in reverse cowgirl. For the final position, Alektra gets back on her back as Brad slides himself into her ass for some anal missionary. Eventually he can’t hold back any longer as he then pulls out and sprays her face and mouth. Just like jessica earlier, Alektra stays in character even during the sex. This is actually something that remains pretty constant throughout the movie and it makes for a much more interesting film.

Scene 4: jessica drake and Mac Turner

jessica is in her bed when she thinks she hears Rocco. It is soon revealed that it’s actually Mac and after he is able to talk her into giving into her desires she can start to have some real fun. She abruptly grabs him and they start to make out. He starts to grab and lick his way down her body and then starts to eat her out. Being the nympho she is, jessica then starts to suck him off for a while before letting him slide into her in missionary. jessica then saddles up for cowgirl as her moaning and cooing continues. For the finale, jessica gets on all fours for doggie. Mac then finishes up by painting her ass. jessica pretty much immediately regrets what happens and goes into a fit once Mac leaves. The setup and finish to this scene really shows why jessica has won so many awards for her acting. The innocence of her charter Janet is really on display here.

Scene 5: Kaylani Lei, Annie Cruz and Rocco Reed

Now it’s time to find out what is happening with Rocco. He is in his room with Kaylani and Annie as we find them finishing making him up. The ladies then argue, kind of, in order to figure out who is going to ride Rocco. Eventually Kaylani gets to go and while she is being licked by Rocco, Annie is licking his shaft. Kaylani eventually hops off and helps Annie work Rocco’s cock for a little bit before Annie hops on for cowgirl. Kaylani gets on her knees for doggie next as Annie also slides in under her so that she can eat her out with some 69 action. Annie lies back for anal missionary to finish off the sex before Rocco pulls out and shares his load with both ladies. They did a great job making Kaylani and Annie look alike and it definitely pays off in the scene. The makeup that Rocco is wearing for the scene made me think of the band KISS too and I thought that was kind of funny, if not a little distracting.

Scene 6: Nicki Hunter and Randy Spears

This may be the oddest scene in the movie for the simple reason that Randy may be the creepiest looking character I have ever seen in a porn movie. He is funny throughout the movie but still pretty creepy. Things quickly heat up as Randy starts in by sucking on Nicki’s pussy. Nicki then shows off some more of her skills but sucking off Randy before sliding on top of him in reverse cowgirl. Nicki bends over at the waist next for some doggie anal before getting back on her back for vaginal missionary. Randy then finishes the scene off with a nice pop shot across and on Nicki’s waiting face. I liked this scene as much as Nicki’s first scene with Alektra earlier in the movie. Randy, as always, brings his A game.

Scene 7: jessica drake and Puma Swede

It is finally time to see what the creation has in her and jessica will be just the right person to find out. Things start out quickly as jessica starts by lapping Puma’s pussy. This then leads to Puma doing the same thing to jessica while she is bent over. Puma stops licking for a little while as she then starts rubbing her instead. The tables then turn again as jessica takes over and starts using Puma’s bead necklace into her pussy and then Puma does the same to jessica with her necklace too. After this, most of the rest of the cast shows up to encourage the two ladies and this leads to jessica donning a red strap on and using it on Puma in doggie. Puma cleans off her juices after this and at this point everyone seems to like what they see. After Puma is done cleaning the fake cock, jessica continues as they go at it in standing missionary and then into cowgirl as Puma rides jessica hard. They go back to regular missionary after this and soon after, Mac calls cut. This could almost be broken into two scenes. Personally I preferred the second half with the strap on. Both jessica and Puma seemed a bit more energetic during that part.

Scene 8: jessica drake, Kaylani Lei, Nicki Hunter, Kirsten Price, Alektra Blue, Annie Cruz, Puma Swede, Brandy Aniston, Lucky Starr, Mac Turner, Rocco Reed, Randy Spears, Dick Chibbles, Jack Vegas, Tommy Gunn, Marcus London and Ron Jeremy

As has been the tradition the last couple years, Wicked finishes another one of their big releases with an orgy, featuring the entire cast. Like most orgies, there is a lot going on here and I don’t want to even attempt. I will say that this scene does have something for everyone. There is some girl/girl action, titty fucking and anal.

Extras:

When it comes to their big releases Wicked doesn’t skimp on the extras and this is no exception. All of the extras are on the second disc and include things like interviews, trailers, bloopers, a BTS, audition footage (not the video featured on YouTube by the way) and a video about all the costumes. There are also three additional bonus scenes from Anarchy, The Perfect Getaway and SPEED.

Final Thoughts and Rating:

A lot of studios have hopped onto the parody bandwagon and have failed, mostly because they chose the wrong show or movie to parody. So when I heard Wicked was going to dip their toes into the porn parody pool I was excited, if not a little apprehensive, but I figured if anyone could make a movie work, it’s Brad Armstrong. The greatest strength that this movie has is how close they stay to the original movie, in both look and film. Obviously the original wasn’t about a naïve couple stumbling on a porn set but the general kookiness is intact. Being a Wicked movie, you know they are going to use their contract girls and I think they nailed it on the head when they chose who would play which parts. Randy Spears is brilliant as Stiff-Staff, a couple times he had me laughing so hard that I had to pause the movie in order to recover. The most outstanding job though has to go to Mac Turner. He was so close to Tim Curry in the original movie that it was scary. If you are a fan of the original movie this is definitely a must have and I would tell anyone that likes a good and funny story to go along with their sex to pick this up as well. The Rocki Whore Picture Show: A Hardcore Parody gets a 5 out of 5.

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